Is self-love selfish?

So often when I mention the word or words self-love, a person may look at me with that quaint look in their eyes, as if to say, ‘so you want to be selfish?’ Let’s be clear, there is a big difference between egotistical love and self-love.

Self-love comes from a deeper knowing, a place from within where wisdom and understanding is cultivated and then implemented into a daily type lifestyle. Self-love seems like an old cliché, yet we need to focus on it anyway!

As the new ways begin to unfold, we are being asked to look at the world from the inside of ourselves first. We are being asked to put up those boundaries, to use the word ‘No’ more often when it comes to thinking of ourselves and our feelings. Become more assertive (which is not aggression). We are really very good at doing a lot for others all of the time but sometimes this is to our own detriment. We may finally get to a point where we are only running on empty. It’s a point of burnout.

We also need to look deeper at aspects such as, co-dependency and control when it comes to always ‘giving’. By continually giving or helping others are we in fact fulfilling the need to be needed? Are we perhaps towing others in the hopes of ‘fixing’ them? Are we carrying others burdens in order to prevent them from being hurt along the way? We need to consider that perhaps at times, this may not be helping them at all, as each of us must learn our own life lessons in order to be stronger, wiser and more of who we truly are. We may even need to look at the idea that we use certain situations, to steer ourselves away from our own lives, in order to avoid facing our own fears. Don’t misunderstand the point of looking deeper into helping others, yes you definitely must help others, that’s a major part of our existence. But the idea is to be sure that you are doing so from a place of first being your true self, first loving yourself, working from the inside out, not from the outside in!

The energy that is presently presented asks us to look at those fears and those situations that we need to deal with, and in doing so, self-love becomes a higher concern. When we look deeper at our individual lives and see how the patterns and puzzle pieces fall into place, we get the idea of how to break certain cycles and how to change our futures, into being more productive and more in line with our higher purpose.

But where to even begin, you may ask? Our beliefs and values play a major role when it comes to self-love and understanding. We may find at times we really just stand in our own way. How do we tell our story? plays a role in our manifested reality. And one of my favorites is; Who’s voice is it anyway? When faced with a situation or a sabotaging type belief or idea, we need to stop and ask ourselves these questions. Often you will find that what we believe to be our own voice is in fact a voice from the past, reminding us that we are not worthy or that we are not good enough or even that we will not succeed.

In order to change our beliefs and our story into a more positive uplifting type mindset, we can start with affirmations. These are ideas and statements that you may not believe at first but with time will come to change a limiting belief that you once thought impossible.Learning to love yourself takes patience and it is in the endurance and running the long race that the benefits and the magic appear.

I offer some affirmations of confidence, self-love and inspirational. I share these with you in the hopes that they encourage you to delve deeper internally and seek the true essence of yourself that is waiting to be discovered and to unfold.

• I open myself up to receiving all the love that surrounds me

• Loving myself from a soul perspective, helps me to attract more of the love that I am

• I breathe in love and see the support and love that surrounds me through each day

• As I believe that I am love, I see more of the world as loving

• I look for the good in myself, I look for the good in others, I feel all the love

• I feel confident, I hold my head up and walk with confidence

• I am worthy and deserving of receiving all the goodness on offer

• I am definitely good enough

Self-love is not selfish; it is necessary in order for us to reach a more conscious level of being and then become more authentic. Right now, as things around us change, we are being asked to do the same, change. Truth will prevail and truth sets us free. Loving yourself first allows you to love others in an authentic and truthful way. Your time is now, be the love that you
are.

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